Day 120

A little progress. :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::It hurt me when I sensed that he did it deliberately. The more he behaved indifferently, the more obvious that he couldn’t let it go. I had to pretend I didn’t notice anything in order to keep the conversation going. I had no choice but behaved similarly to him — covering up the true feelings. On this point, z is truer than him. Z’s action reflects what he thinks or feels outrightly. I may have given up making z to like me. But there is no doubt that z is more straightforward and I like to deal with people who behaves truthfully. Given that it is his second nature to hide the true feelings, I believe he’s already tried his best to cope with the change between us. I have no resentment on everything. Of cos, no hope as well. #art #painting #flower #luciashen #artjourney1000days #watercolor

Day 119

Why counting days? Where the journey will lead me to? I had thousands of such thoughts in my mind tonight. Kind of down and didn’t know what kind of life I want to live. Until my dearest yan told me so many jokes and I almost cried many times for his funny actions and performance. And only in the end I realized that what makes him happy is just to see mum is happy. 
Not for others, not for myself. My children are the outmost meaning of my life. #dailyart #watercolor #artjourney1000days #luciashen #flower #painting #art 

Day 113

#Day113 Drew it on the way to Malacca. We will spend two days there. To my surprise, I brought my laptop on the vacation. My project leader is very good. Gave me the trust and opportunities to work independently. Provided strong support when I’m in doubt. I’m motivated to work hard again. 
#flowerdrawing #dailyart #artjourney1000days #stilllife #handdrawing 

Day 112

I don’t quite like sketching and painting leaves. My teacher can paint very nice trees. Maybe one of his favorite subjects. ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

言肚子不舒服,在家陪他休息半天。

这世上有没有不用努力就能拥有的能力啊!😌 

300年是什么概念?几辈子啊!我的生命好像无形中又延长了。

Day 111

Finished. :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

“作为一个艺术家,别人对你的评价重要吗?”我问。

“为了生存,我们无法不在乎别人的看法。”画家沉默片刻后回答。

我喜欢毛姆的比喻,“人生就是一片破波斯地毯。”

#flowerpainting #flowers #luciashen #dailyart #stilllife #artjourney1000days #art #luciashen 

Day 109

Preparing for tomorrow. :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

“Folks don’t like to have somebody around knowing more than they do. It aggravates them. You are not gonna change any of them by talking right. They have to want to learn themselves, and when they don’t want to learn there’s nothing you can do but keep your mouth shut or talk their language. ”

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去参观老师的画展,第一次看见老师的画,很平静,素雅,感觉心态很好,超然物外。和另一个画家聊天,不知为什么,好像谈到某些话题的时候,画家有些激动,也许是不经意间碰触到某些柔软或悲痛的地方所致。孤注一掷所带来的成就感和创伤几乎是等重的。我问,作为一个艺术家,别人的认同是否是追求的一部分。画家沉默半响,我想我已知道答案了。反观老师的顺其自然好象更接近我追求的状态。艺术上的追求,其实是很个人的事,我愿意这样走下去,因为在艺术的世界里,我是自由的。

#luciashen #dailyart #stilllife #watercolor #artjourney1000days #flowerpainting